New Website!

Hi sweet friends. I have a new website where I maintain my blog.

e-mail me at krickledoo@me.com for the information.

Happy reading,

Kari

Presence. Presents.

His presence these past couple of days has been an absolute gift to me. Jet-lag is a funny thing. My body is heavy, feeling like I should be in a deep sleep, but my mind is racing. Yesterday morning from about 4:30 on I couldn't sleep. Finally, about 7:30 I got out of bed and grabbed the ipod and my Bible. As I sat there and listened to a couple of songs His glory filled my heart. I am truly overwhelmed at the present of His presence. I don't know if this is really what was going on, but after living in a spiritually dark place for the past 7 months it felt totally different to be back here. The spiritual climate feels different. I felt so free, just sitting in His presence and worshiping Him.

I read this..."We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many." 2 Corinthians 1:8-11.

In my need for Father, His love, His grace, His guidance, His strength, His faithfulness...HIS presence--I have learned the purpose of hardship, trial, suffering, difficulty is simply my need for Him. If life is easy, if my days are rosy then I have no true relationship. I might acknowledge God with my words or actions, but I am not in need of Him. The beauty of my relationship with God is that I am desperate for Him and it is His desire to freely give (and give abundantly) of Himself.

Oh, I want to be thirsty. The last couple of days have been slow. When my brain is working my body is tired, and when my body is awake during the day my brain wants to sleep. So here I am...I've been up since 4:00 this morning with my mind racing and He has calmed me with His present of presence.

If you haven't read the words to the song, "Worth It All" in the post below, I invite you to. "I'm desperately seeking, frantic believing that the sight of Your face is all that I need."

He is so worth it.
Enjoy the present of His presence today.
Kari

Rest

I was blessed to spend this past weekend with women from all over Asia who do what we do. We talked about rest and refreshment. We were challenged to learn what it is that brings us refreshment. I learned that a grateful heart is a refreshed heart. When I spend time focused on the things I am thankful for, when I allow Father to fill my mind with things that are pure and lovely (Phil. 4) my entire attitude is changed. I actually feel physically different. After-all Matthew 11:28-30 says, "Come to me all you who are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and lowly in heart."

We were also challenged to think about the differences between hospitality and entertaining. Our culture has glamorized entertaining - perfect house, perfect food, ambiance. I don't know about you, but when I entertain it drains me. I get stressed about everything looking right, tasting right...and it feels like there is way to much to do. In that sort of entertaining I have realized we're actually serving ourselves, our pride, our image. I want to be hospitable. The idea is to serve those who come, to refresh them. To offer a simple cup of tea, or juice. To have some oreo's on hand. I want to realize it's not about me or what I have to offer, it is about me being a true friend. Allowing Holy Spirit to use me to minister to the people or person I am with. Proverbs 11:25 says, "Those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed."

Life over here is not easy. Some days are discouraging, while others are uplifting. I miss my family, and the ease of life in the states. But I have learned to be content in Jesus. I know that apart from fellowship with Him there is not contentment, not here or there, not anywhere.

I've was introduced to a Rita Springer song, "Worth it All" this past weekend. The first time we sang through it, when we got to the chorus the tears were just streaming down my face.

"I don't understand your ways, oh, but I will give you my song. Give you all my praise. You hold on to all my pain, with it you are drawing me closer and pulling me into your ways. Now around every corner and up every mountain I'm not looking for crowns or the water from fountains. I'm desperate in seeking, frantic believing that the sight of your face is all that I need. I will say to you...It's gonna be worth it. It's gonna be worth it. It's gonna be worth it all; I believe this. Jesus, You're worth it. Jesus, You're worth it. Jesus, You're worth it all; I believe this."

Oh, but I will give you my song. I desire to share my song with you, despite not understanding all Father does, all the intricacies of life. And Father has encouraged me, HE is worth it. No sacrifice I give, no pain I go through can compare to the sacrifice He made so that I can experience true life.

It's gonna be worth it.

Kari

Sharing...

A friend of mine (hi R) recently commented that she often came here hoping to read about what God is doing in my life. Things have been busy lately. I have been challenged to really use each moment of each day to bring glory to God. More than anything this has really been a challenge to be selfless-- in the way I serve my family, in the way I serve God, in the way I push through the BCD's (that is bad language/culture days--thanks R), in the way I seek to always be prepared to share a reason for the hope that I have. I've been spending more time in God's word in the morning, more time singing praises to my King with my daughter...I've been cooking more meals for my family, studying language on my down time. God has been working so much here. We had an opportunity last weekend to go to a friends home and talk about Easter with them. The entire story was communicated effectively. Father, Mother, Grandmother, Aunt, Friend, Niece all heard the truth that can give them life. We left a dvd with them hoping they would watch it later. My friend told me two days later that the entire family had watched it and her father had watched it twice. Yesterday I was able to share with a friend in the morning and my new tutor in the afternoon.

With days so full time flies. I'm thankful that my friend asked me again to write about what I am learning. I need time to sit and reflect on all that is going on around me. Today was a really hard day. My husband had a BCD and it impacted his mood and mine. Sometimes I don't know what to do or say, and nothing seems to help. But God was quick to call my heart to Himself and to lift my husband to Him. It was a little bit ironic. I was making dinner and seething, just almost at whits end, so I prayed for him and he almost immediately did a complete mood turnaround...the ironic thing was that by that point I was already completely sucked into the bad mood. So now tonight I've been constently asking forgiveness for my bad mood and seeking God to help me be slow to anger and quick to love. WHEW! I guess this is what real-time refinement looks like. Father is teaching me and all the while offering me ways to practice what He's preaching. I hope to be more consistent in writing on here in the coming weeks. It really blesses my life and I hope it blesses yours. I also thank you for praying for me and my family as we continue to seek to sacrifice ourselves for the glory of God.

Singing His Song,
Kari

"Cease striving."

After nearly three weeks of traveling we are home. We've spent the last couple of days getting rid of cold and flu we caught on our journey, doing load after load of laundry, and just trying to get back into the swing of things.

I've really missed this. You know, God does so much in my heart and life and this is a way He has given me to really share it with others, but more than that, to process all that He is teaching me and changing in me. So, I'm back. It's hard to know where to begin. So I'll just share a few tid-bits He has been showing me.

Psalm 46:10 is very well known. It says, "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!" Another translation changes the first two words to "Cease striving." That is what God has been whispering to me over and over again. A sweet woman of God said it to me this way, "Don't be a perfect person. Be a weaker vessel." There are times when I feel so incredibly overwhelmed- overwhelmed with responsibilities, needs, fears, tasks. It is in those moments when I am so frustrated and just at my whits end that my own sometimes sub-conscious strivings for perfection are shattered. At that moment in my weak state I know how dependent I am on God. How I absolutely need Him for each step and each breath. So my prayer has changed, "Father, don't make me stronger or wiser, or more perfect, make me weaker. Make me weak so that Your strength is seen." Some might think this prayer is belittling, but on the contrary it is completely freeing. I am freed to cease striving, to allow His glorious might and power to be displayed in my life. "Cease striving."

Please be praying for me. I have a husband to love, serve, pray for, pray with, do laundry for, and cook for. I have a daughter who needs sleep, nourishment, play-time, instruction, discipline and direction. I am seeking to learn an incredibly difficult language. I have national friends to be sharing with and discipling. I have foreign friends to fellowship with and encourage. Life is incredibly full. On my own strength I can only scratch the surface of these needs. Most of all I desire to live a life that glorifies God. I want to be a woman of prayer, rising early to praise my God and intercede for those He has placed in my life. Please intercede on my behalf. Ask that I would be filled with the Holy Spirit so that God may be glorified. Ask that I would decrease so that He can increase. Thank you for loving me and allowing me to share my most deep needs with you.

Resting in the comfort of His arms,
Kari