Presence. Presents.

His presence these past couple of days has been an absolute gift to me. Jet-lag is a funny thing. My body is heavy, feeling like I should be in a deep sleep, but my mind is racing. Yesterday morning from about 4:30 on I couldn't sleep. Finally, about 7:30 I got out of bed and grabbed the ipod and my Bible. As I sat there and listened to a couple of songs His glory filled my heart. I am truly overwhelmed at the present of His presence. I don't know if this is really what was going on, but after living in a spiritually dark place for the past 7 months it felt totally different to be back here. The spiritual climate feels different. I felt so free, just sitting in His presence and worshiping Him.

I read this..."We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many." 2 Corinthians 1:8-11.

In my need for Father, His love, His grace, His guidance, His strength, His faithfulness...HIS presence--I have learned the purpose of hardship, trial, suffering, difficulty is simply my need for Him. If life is easy, if my days are rosy then I have no true relationship. I might acknowledge God with my words or actions, but I am not in need of Him. The beauty of my relationship with God is that I am desperate for Him and it is His desire to freely give (and give abundantly) of Himself.

Oh, I want to be thirsty. The last couple of days have been slow. When my brain is working my body is tired, and when my body is awake during the day my brain wants to sleep. So here I am...I've been up since 4:00 this morning with my mind racing and He has calmed me with His present of presence.

If you haven't read the words to the song, "Worth It All" in the post below, I invite you to. "I'm desperately seeking, frantic believing that the sight of Your face is all that I need."

He is so worth it.
Enjoy the present of His presence today.
Kari

Rest

I was blessed to spend this past weekend with women from all over Asia who do what we do. We talked about rest and refreshment. We were challenged to learn what it is that brings us refreshment. I learned that a grateful heart is a refreshed heart. When I spend time focused on the things I am thankful for, when I allow Father to fill my mind with things that are pure and lovely (Phil. 4) my entire attitude is changed. I actually feel physically different. After-all Matthew 11:28-30 says, "Come to me all you who are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and lowly in heart."

We were also challenged to think about the differences between hospitality and entertaining. Our culture has glamorized entertaining - perfect house, perfect food, ambiance. I don't know about you, but when I entertain it drains me. I get stressed about everything looking right, tasting right...and it feels like there is way to much to do. In that sort of entertaining I have realized we're actually serving ourselves, our pride, our image. I want to be hospitable. The idea is to serve those who come, to refresh them. To offer a simple cup of tea, or juice. To have some oreo's on hand. I want to realize it's not about me or what I have to offer, it is about me being a true friend. Allowing Holy Spirit to use me to minister to the people or person I am with. Proverbs 11:25 says, "Those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed."

Life over here is not easy. Some days are discouraging, while others are uplifting. I miss my family, and the ease of life in the states. But I have learned to be content in Jesus. I know that apart from fellowship with Him there is not contentment, not here or there, not anywhere.

I've was introduced to a Rita Springer song, "Worth it All" this past weekend. The first time we sang through it, when we got to the chorus the tears were just streaming down my face.

"I don't understand your ways, oh, but I will give you my song. Give you all my praise. You hold on to all my pain, with it you are drawing me closer and pulling me into your ways. Now around every corner and up every mountain I'm not looking for crowns or the water from fountains. I'm desperate in seeking, frantic believing that the sight of your face is all that I need. I will say to you...It's gonna be worth it. It's gonna be worth it. It's gonna be worth it all; I believe this. Jesus, You're worth it. Jesus, You're worth it. Jesus, You're worth it all; I believe this."

Oh, but I will give you my song. I desire to share my song with you, despite not understanding all Father does, all the intricacies of life. And Father has encouraged me, HE is worth it. No sacrifice I give, no pain I go through can compare to the sacrifice He made so that I can experience true life.

It's gonna be worth it.

Kari